I failed in what I always wanted to achieve, my topmost priority.
I think I am not just losing focus, but I feel myself drowning. Sometimes, Its like my life is slowly slipping away and nothing can be done. Over the years, I have always been someone who was always sure of everything, like what and where I would be in the next five years.
At this point though, I feel like a block head.
I feel pressured.
These days, I wake up feeling overwhelmed not because I have put in the work but because the air is thick. It’s like a billion people are looking up to me and slipping was not an option.
I have really tried to keep my life and everything private even to my Mum who is the closest person to my heart, but I couldn’t help it this time.
I think the main reason I told her was so that she wouldn’t expect so much from me (LOL)
I worked hard; Stayed up visualizing and was so focused on pulling through and achieving what I wanted.
I am talking to God and thinking of going for therapy. These days though, I try to talk to my Mum more and laugh more. I am surrounding myself with everything positive. Oh, I also drafted plans as to how I can get back on my feet. The first two plans failed the day I started, but I made another one.
It’s still a long road ahead, but I will be fine.